To those whom it may concern, spoilers for Evil Bong.

Alistair (David Weidoff) is a nerd; we can tell from his symmetrically parted hair, glasses, and pocket protector. Alistair moves in with three cool bros named Larnell (John Patrick Jordan), Bachman (Mitch Eakins), and Brett (Brian Lloyd); we know they’re cool because they lift five-pound weights, eat red meat, and always ask if you’re a narc before letting you into their crib.

Our heroes are tragic figures. Bachman’s seashell busted from mishandling, he is destined never to hear the ocean again. Once primed to be a major leaguer, Brett lost his shot at stardom due to Continue reading Evil Bong (2006) is a Masterpiece →