Category Archives: Leave it

Movies I wish I had skipped. This could be for any number of reasons: the film was made sloppily, the narrative didn’t engage me, or I simply could not connect with the film in any way for whatever reason.

Meet the Blacks (2016) Movie Review

When deciding what movie to see at the theaters Thursday night, I compared new releases on Google Trends. Of the new releases this weekend, Eye in the Sky stole the show in terms of search traffic proportions, God is Not Dead 2 had meager traffic, and Meet the Blacks was a goose egg across the board. Seemingly off the map of Google searches, I was intrigued, and decided to table Eye in the Sky for my Friday matinee. The question is, then, was it a worthwhile choice?

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Meet the Blacks is a horror comedy spoof a la Scary Movie following the Black family as they move into their new lavish home in Beverly Hills. And, of course, they also have to deal with Continue reading Meet the Blacks (2016) Movie Review

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016) Movie Review

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice begins in medias res of The Man Steel climax, showing in this case the perspective of Ben Affleck’s Bruce Wayne. As he runs headfirst into the rubble of a crushed Wayne Enterprises building, he has a number of save the cat moments. This, despite the later scenes in which he brands criminals with the bat-symbol, which pretty much nullifies this initial scene.

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18 months later, an alien artifact from the battle of Metropolis washes up on shore somewhere in the Indian Ocean and Lois Lane (Amy Adams) is working with the CIA to catch a suspected terrorist. As Superman (Henry Cavill) flies in to save Lois, he is Continue reading Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016) Movie Review

The Brothers Grimsby (2016) Movie Review

How else could you possibly start a Sacha Baron Cohen film but with a grotesque sex scene over an R. Kelly track. Not to mention a low-brow Cosby crack.

In The Brothers Grimsby, Nobby (Cohen) is a lowly, dim man who has been waiting for his brother Sebastian’s (Mark Strong) return for 28 years. Sebastian, now an MI6 secret agent, has no intention of ever being found.

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The opening credits action scene is surprisingly Continue reading The Brothers Grimsby (2016) Movie Review

Zoolander 2 (2016) Movie Review

Sequels can be many things. They can be good…sometimes. Or they can be superficial rehashes. Or they can be pure nostalgia pieces. Or they can be re-imaginings with topical insertions to try and bring an old property into the present day, where these insertions take the place of original comedy.

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Zoolander 2 falls mostly into the latter category. Justin Beiber, Uber, and Susan Boyle are featured in early gags, in moments meant to hook the viewer in. These “topical” moments (Susan Boyle = topical?) feel Continue reading Zoolander 2 (2016) Movie Review

Sisters (2015) Movie Review

In Sisters, the eponymous sisters Maura (Amy Poehler) and Kate (Tina Fey) are misguided and somewhat juvenile. The two travel to their parent’s house in Orlando, which they find sold and emptied. They protest the loss of their childhood home, and ultimately decide to throw one last party in the house in an attempt to return to their glory days.

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The film totes the expected cavalcade of SNL alum. At the head are Fey and Poehler, both of whom Continue reading Sisters (2015) Movie Review

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016) Movie Review

 

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is adapted from the book of the same name, and it is exactly what you think. Jane Austen’s famous characters return to the big screen, only now they aren’t combating class and gender barriers, they are samurai fighting zombies.

 

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The film, understanding that the audience is likely already familiar with the Austen classic, begins with some heavy handed exposition revolving around the nature of the narrative’s zombie outbreak. This opening scene involves an interesting point of view shot that comes from a unique perspective, to say the least. Unfortunately, Continue reading Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016) Movie Review

Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995) Movie Review

 

The 1995 Halloween sequel The Curse of Michael Myers is a non-canon plot revolving around cults and a survivor of a previous Myers’ massacre. Teenage Jamie (J.C. Brandy) gives birth to a boy on the eve of Halloween, but the child is abducted. Then, she gets the child back and escapes from the candle-lit void of a soundstage that she is resting in before Myers can get to her. Myers, all the while, is searching for the baby, and killing everyone who gets in his way.

 

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The opening of the film is a confusing mash-up of quick cuts and a voiceover that is easy to ignore. Even later, when Jamie is on the run, the film cuts away from action and uses misplaced ellipsis to makes sure the Continue reading Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995) Movie Review