Tag Archives: Dwayne Johnson

Skyscraper (2018) Movie Review

Chances are that you already know if you want to see Skyscraper. It is a 1980s style action film with a poster featuring Dwayne Johnson hanging precariously from a building. There isn’t much mystery as to what the appeals of the film are.

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Name an action movie, and it is somewhere in the bones of this film. Terrorists hijack the world’s tallest building in Hong Kong—it is three times taller than the Empire State Building—setting it on fire. Trapped inside are Continue reading Skyscraper (2018) Movie Review

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Rampage (2018) Movie Review

Rampage is a 1980s arcade game in which three giant, mutated animals—a gorilla, a lizard, and a wolf—stomp through city skylines. The monsters tear down buildings, destroy military vehicles, and eat people. All for points. The game was popular enough to be ported over to multiple video game consoles.

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The video game has no story and few characters (the monsters are given names, at least). Yet, somehow, Hollywood has managed to give the intellectual property both of these things. At least, enough of these things to produce a marketable movie.

It isn’t as if the creatures of Rampage are Continue reading Rampage (2018) Movie Review

Baywatch (2017) Movie Review

Remember CHiPs? Remember how that worked out? Yeah? See where I’m going with this?

Starting from a baseline jump in which no one can possibly take it seriously is seemingly a good place for a film to begin. Expectations are meaningless when you are a high concept soft reboot with guaranteed bankability.

With the bar set this low, we shall look at Baywatch with a grain of salt (I would say sand, but this review is no laughing matter).

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Matt Brody (Zac Efron and his washboard abs) is a disgraced two-time Olympic gold medalist whose career has been ruined by an unfortunate, vomitus-centered relay race. With no sponsors, job, or home, Brody has only one place to turn to: Continue reading Baywatch (2017) Movie Review

The Fate of the Furious (2017) Movie Review

In Havana, Dominic Toretto’s (Vin Diesel) cousin (Janmarco Santiago) gets his car towed by the man with the fastest car in Cuba. Toretto challenges the man to a race for the cousin’s car. What comes from this is a race of the fastest car against the slowest car. It is a race predicated on family and honor, and, of course, Dom wins.

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Those unfamiliar to the The Fast and The Furious franchise may find this cold open to The Fate of the Furious, this eighth installment to the series, silly, both in theme and in how it plays out. But it is also Continue reading The Fate of the Furious (2017) Movie Review

Furious 6 (2013) Movie Review

The later three The Fast and Furious films, excluding the upcoming The Fate of the Furious, are heralded as the rare occasion in which the later installments of a franchise are better than their predecessors. This trilogy has been hugely successful from all sides. Fans like them. Critics tolerate them, at the very least. And the box office loves them.

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Furious Six is where all pretense of the franchise’s premise fall away. The film is barely about Continue reading Furious 6 (2013) Movie Review

Fast Five (2011) Movie Review

Fast Five, the fittingly-titled fifth film in the Fast & Furious franchise, begins where its predecessor left off: a high stakes, improbable break out of Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) by his best friend Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker) and sister Mia (Jordana Brewster).

Following this successful bus flipping, Brian and Mia go into hiding, proving that they are now full-blown, no remorse criminals.

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There is a noticeable shift in quality between Continue reading Fast Five (2011) Movie Review

Moana (2016) Movie Review

Moana (Auli’i Cravalho) is a Polynesian islander and daughter of the chief of Motu Nui. Moana is raised on tall tales of legendary heroes and dastardly monsters, the story of demigod Maui (Dwayne Johnson) stealing away the heart of the Mother Island rousing in her the spirit of adventure.

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Caught between this adventurous spirit and a call to lead her tribe, a divide between land and sea, Moana ventures out beyond the reef to Continue reading Moana (2016) Movie Review